Appreciation and communication. It is easy to say “thank you” when your mom makes you dinner or your brother takes out the trash so you get a night off from chores. However, Drs. John and Julie Gottman of The Gottman Institute recommend going beyond appreciating the things that are done for you, to appreciating the qualities of the people you care about.
When we communicate fondness and admiration for someone, our affection and respect for that individual naturally increases (Gottman 2020). What better way to increase positive communication at home than by sharing what you admire and appreciate about your people! It is easy to assume they must already know, but stating your appreciation out loud lets them know they are valued and loved, even in the midst of the stress and challenges brought by quarantine and staying home.
Share the qualities you appreciate about your loved ones, with some specific ideas to get you started: strong, thoughtful, kind, funny, understanding, inspirational, brave, compassionate, patient, bold and many more – go get started!
Writer: K. von Kampen, M.A., PLMHP